Phil and I have spent some time reflecting on our first year at The Barn, our home and micro retreat centre in the hills of mid Wales with a river running through it…
We’ve been asking ourselves - what is the ‘right work’ to do during these, the strangest of days?
And
What is the difference that makes the difference?
And
What is a useful act of relevance, an act of efficacy, an act with meaning, an act of worth?
And
If we ‘make art’ in response to or in service of these times, then – what kind of art do we make?
We’ve been trusting, that doing things ‘at scale’ is not currently in our compass. By scale, we mean large scale. We’ve been digging deep not digging wide. We’ve been working at a human scale and we have created a small space of sanctuary and creativity here at The Barn.
This year…
We’ve guided a Vision Fast for 4 people.
We’ve guided Space for Change for 4 people.
We’ve guided Bardsey Time for 4 people.
We’ve hosted 12 Artists for week long creative residencies in The Barn.
People have come and gone in search of rest, recovery and rejuvenation at The Barn, including the Medical Director of a Hospice, a Vet, and a Counsellor who works with ‘at risk’ young people.
We ‘ve facilitated 6 ‘Way of Councils’ on White Privilege for around 50 people online.
Whilst Phil has been busy in his other job, writing screenplays (Casualty, Doctors and a new documentary for Netflix),
I have been the celebrant for a funeral for 1 man previously unknown to me though we both shared a birthday, 28th May.
I have lead a RitualArtworK with and for 5 young Cornish based performers curating a walking workshop along the South West Coastal Path to mark the end of a 9-month creative process.
I hosted Women Dancing VII - socially distanced/creatively connected. Musician and artist Eleanor Brown made 2 beautiful films about it:
Women Dancing Alone Part 1
Women Dancing Together Part 2
This season, I’ve also spent a lot of time doing the work needed to look after a piece of land, learning about growing vegetables, with some success. We grew a lot of blackcurrants, squashes, cucumbers, celery, beetroot, chard, kale, broad beans, runner beans and salad crops. Phil and I have fed ourselves and a few others on the fruits of our labours.
Is this enough?
In these times of post-COP26
Is this enough?
In these times of a world-wide pandemic
Is this enough?
In these times of border restrictions and withdrawal of sanctuary
Is this enough?
I am currently working on an ‘art project’ with Suzi Gablik - artist, writer, art critic, activist, speaker, friend. The project involves reading and recording her final published book, the closest she has written to an autobiography: ‘Living the Magical Life: An Oracular Adventure’. The recordings are then burnt onto disc and posted to Suzi’s home address in Blacksburg, Virginia in the U.S. Suzi has been a great mentor and inspiration to myself and so many artists and activists whose life and work has been changed, shaped and directed by her writings. The books in order read like a history of the development of ecological art activism in the 20th century, each pushing the boundaries more than the last.
Magritte
Progress in Art
Has Modernism Failed
The Re-enchantment of Art
Conversations Before the End of Time
Living the Magical Life
What is the difference that makes the difference?
Our project has been going on for almost one year now and this phase of the project is drawing to a close. I have just finished recording 29 chapters and an epilogue, totalling over 17 hours of reading and recording. Living the Magical Life is not currently available as a talking book and Suzi has a neurological condition which makes reading impossible and hearing difficult. I read her words, slowly, loudly, clearly, record them, send them to her, she listens with headphones. She responds…
In the first few pages of this extraordinary book, Suzi quotes Thomas Moore:
“The secret of a soul-based life is to allow someone or something other than the usual self to be in charge”. Suzi proceeds to spend the rest of the book exploring what this might be and invites us to do the same.
Hers is not just a theoretical or academic enquiry. Suzi asks
a series of questions and shares a process which makes her entirely and
personally vulnerable. She comes up against dead-ends and unlikely u-turns. The
going is never smooth or predictable. Something keeps her going, something
keeps her committed even when the odds are stacked against her so high they are
in danger of annihilating her.
The subtitle of the book is ‘An Oracular Adventure’. Throughout, she catalogues the range of divinatory techniques she is working with: I Ching; Tarot decks; divine guidance from The Black Madonna, listening for signs from the universe and even pulling words at random from a Thesaurus. Her questions become increasingly specific and urgent:
So much of the time it feels like I’m sinking into quicksand, spinning my heels. “How should I proceed?"
"Aim high, refuse to give up hope, come up smiling, avoid defeat."
"What is the best thing I can do?" She asks
"Hold the faith, right minded, soundminded, balanced, assenting, undivided, unswerving…"
"Will I be protected?"
“Adventure story. Love story”.
In the final chapters, she asks herself ‘Was I really discovering a magical path, or was I just making it all up?’ She puts her entire enquiry and her life on the line.
Doubt seems to be a part of any genuine quest or worthwhile human endeavour.
The Gablik Recordings is an emergent art project – we don’t know where it will go after this first phase. I have spoken to her about creating a ‘workshop’ or the ‘Suzi Gablik Summer School’ with her spirit, thesis and this book at the heart of it…
Suzi Gablik celebrated her 87th birthday in September. The story continues.
And so, my current answer to what is the difference that makes the difference? We continue to do the work that is ours to do, regardless of scale.
We continue to ask the questions, and to receive information, support, and guidance in the strangest ways. At times of confusion, doubt, loss of hope and direction I do what Suzi and so many of my mentors do and surrender to the process, to the spirit of the depths and the spirit of the times and to emergence…
And finally, blessings on those that we have lost in these past weeks, ones who were the difference that made the difference, and offered an example, and support and guidance to so many. Those who have created, taught and inspired so many through their lives and doing the work that was theirs to do:
1926 - 2021
1956 - 2021
1952 – 2021
Signing out for 2021 and sending love and gratitude to you all for being a part of this journey of Emergence,
Mid-Winter Greetings,
Happy Solstice,
Nadolig Llawen,
Fern and Phil x
www.emergence-uk.org.